Will Be Yours…Until Sex Do Us Part

Will Be Yours…Until Sex Do Us Part
I was talking with my 17 year old brother and some of his
friends one day and as usual, we talked about those
things boys like discussing including love, girls and sex.
At first, I thought they were too young to know anything
serious about these things but I was shocked. It turned
out age does not stop experience or show experience;
those boys knew so much that my jaw was constantly
dropping. It all started when one of the boys asked my
brother about a particular girl and my brother hissed and
said “abeg, close that one’s matter jare”. He asked why
and I asked why too because I knew how crazy my
brother was about the girl; he had shown signs of a boy in
love some months ago, regularly talking about her, calling
her, going to visit her and buying things for her, so you
can imagine the shock when he told us to close that
“one’s” matter as if she never mattered to him. My
brother at first ignored our question and shifted the topic
to the FIFA game he was teaching me how to play. I was
too curious to allow that slip by so I asked him again.
The answer I got was heartbreaking, he has slept with the
girl and so, his love and respect died with the sex. He
said something about the girl only being enticed to the
things he got for her and did not love him for who he was.
I asked what he knew about love and he said I should
forget about that, all he knows is that he could get any
girl in his bed as long as he can pay the price. Pretend to
be all for them, get the cookie and then discard them. I
was like Ah and he said “forget that jor. Girls want love,
we want sex. We will give one to get the other”. I was
speechless. I could have discarded this as juvenile talk
except embedded in it was bitter truth. Some guys are
only after the thing underneath a girl’s skirt and would go
the extra mile just to get it. The love would seem all
genuine at first and then suddenly, when he has gotten
tired of her, he would be too quick to get rid of her. And
then girls would say all men are dogs and those guys
would say every girl is a hoe just because they have had
quite enough in bed with them.
I tried having a heart to heart discussion with him about
how he should treat a girl but it was as if his heart had
been made up and he told me he would stop doing that till
he finds a girl worthy of his everything. I asked if he knew
what that girl would go through. He said, she would move
on, find another guy that will buy her flashy things and
then get messed up again. I just stood there
dumbfounded, too stunned to utter another word. I started
wondering who to actually pour the blame on. Is it the girl
that thought every glittering thing was gold or the guy that
thought any woman could be bought with fake glitters?
Maybe it is the society we should blame for carving an
unrealistic niche for girls and boys to follow; if he doesn’t
call you every minute, buy you things, take you out, he
doesn’t love you. If she doesn’t sleep with me, she
doesn’t love me. What happens when you find out the
diamond you had was just a stone coated with a silver
paint? What happens when you find out everything was
just fake. Keep trying till you hit jackpot, right? Then you
hear something like you use what you have to get what
you want, the mantra that has killed many girls.
It is so sad that people love each other these days until
money or sex, do them part.